you left me alone once again.
sigh.
30 November 2007
sad or happy
:
hm......it pay day le.....that mean that my bank increase of $...this month i will be become broke cause i wanna buy hp which my hp spoilt sometime can it can hear other voice when conversation and the receptionof my hp it lousy...hais.....pocket had a big whole again.....i haven really go and buy but that day i saw a hp which quite nice but dunno gd a not i have seen n73 or n81...i use nokia cos i think it free user....hm...i got think sony ericsion which is the latest,i think is flick ones which it will turn on into other music or song....hm....wondering singapore pool can sponser mi a not ,long time nv strike le ....i think g0t 1 year le.....hais....dunno ....very boring and sian ..........................hm....dunno ...
//you left me alone at 9:35 AM
28 November 2007
但愿你知道
:
多少的风风雨雨一起冲破困难无数为什么总走不过这一步为什么上天要这样安排你退出太残酷 让你走的孤独不管你身在何处心里的话想要说出我从来也不会为谁而哭真的好想知心的你再回到当初骂我糊涂 对我大声疾呼眼泪 这夜洒何处我早以不在乎但愿你知道 醉倒在马路的我 在哭但愿你知道 请风替我转告 风却在笑我怎么呼喊你也听不到
//you left me alone at 1:24 PM
27 November 2007
痛到不能说
:
人生有许多难关要过 自古是情关最让人难受 也许我命中注定情海中颠簸 为你我付出这么的多 却让我痛到有苦不能说 因为我爱你就像那飞蛾扑向火 别让我失魂落魄着了魔 解开我的迷惑 收起你的冷漠 你怎忍心这样做 别让我漫漫长夜守寂寞 伤痛已经太多 心也早已伤透 我已不想再为谁去等候
//you left me alone at 1:13 PM
26 November 2007
hm.. sad reply
:
at last she reply my friendster message le..she say she dun have face to see or meet mi...cos i would like to see her.she told mi that wat's wrong during clubbing when i see it my heart down and sad..she told mi to find a beta gal who really match mi.i dunno wat to do...i really lost.....but my heart told mi to see her once again。 鼓起勇气来。i will see u sooner cos i dunn wan let her scare,i wanna let her know that i m around no matter wat she is or hw is she.i will accept de..but just hopfully hope.
//you left me alone at 9:22 AM
25 November 2007
我认输
:
我原本很幸福
无奈会走到这一步
喜欢的人也不再陪我走这条路
眼睁睁的看你离去
寂寞的我只能为你祈帱
静静的守护着你
希望你过得好
不让悲伤陪着你，不让寂寞缠着你
我会把这些痛苦带走
当泪水流干以后
我认输
//you left me alone at 5:25 PM
24 November 2007
我的结局
:
心好像在雨里
在雨里呼唤着你的名
只是你没听见
我正在寻找你
人就像在风里
在风里徘徊着你的影
却看不到你的背影
我好像使乎离你很远
我好难过，好悲伤
只听见你
听见你叫我离你儿去
到了缠酷的寂寞
寂寞就是我的结局
//you left me alone at 12:22 AM
22 November 2007
寂寞天堂
:
谁能了解我，谁能够体谅我。铁了心的我已似呼不再是我。只有你，只有你能让我这么狼狈。忍受的这个结局，承当这个悲伤。一个人独自地走，一个人独自的奔坊。往一个不属于自己的方向走，走进了寂寞天堂。寂寞天堂让我知道你已经走了，心也不在，人也不在我的身边。现在的你，也不再爱我了。眼睁睁得看你离开，离开了我的怀抱，走进繁华的世界。在你的眼里看见自己的寂寞，寂寞陪我走进了寂寞天堂。
//you left me alone at 11:16 AM
20 November 2007
:
到底有谁能够告诉我要怎样回到从前有你在我身边拿生命换都情愿随风作流浪的梦和你再相逢请你告诉我是谁说最坚强的承诺如今却变得脆弱请你告诉我是谁说要永远的等候如今让我孤独地走我又曾经拥有甚麽真心付出结果又如何请告诉我
//you left me alone at 11:24 AM
我是不是该安静的走开
:
我不知道为甚麽这样爱情不是我想像就是找不到往你的方向更别说怎麽遗忘站在雨里泪水在眼底不知道该往那里去心中千万遍不停呼唤你不停疯狂找寻你我是不是该安静的走开还是该勇敢留下来我也不知道那麽多无奈可不可以都重来
//you left me alone at 11:01 AM
19 November 2007
another boring day
:
today i didnt went to work cause i haven recover from bad score throat and fever....
it very boring to stay at hm....
i think i will gone crazy if i continue like that.....(stay @ hm) but sometimes it quite gd cos can save $ ma...
today,i pm her in friendster but i didnt receive her reply.HAIS................
in the lifestyle,i feel very boring,,
eat,work,sleep and we continue this till one day we cant work le and it will become
eat and sleep....(wait for the qenue)(等死 ）
hais....no meaning at all.......
why not we must cherish the time and being with the one we love
if not we will be regrett if we have not done our part....
要真惜每一刻，
要真惜你的一切，
//you left me alone at 9:03 PM
18 November 2007
nothin special...
:
today is a weekend but nothin special at all.when i woke up thought that my sick have recover but it not in the morning i feel damn pain in my head..this two days i had no appetite i think this two day make my weight go down le...i hope that tomorrow it can be fully recover....i cant be sleep the whole dat cause sat i had already slept the whole day le. so in the afternoon,i went to my grandma's hse...i had a majong game with my cousin even i had no mood to play i still carry on cos nothing to do beside playing majong...during the game,suddenly i think of her,think of her that i had majong game with her parents before..y i cant foret her althought we onli togethr for onli 2 months cos among my relationship i had before(3)her family treat mi well as they never say that i m a medium....etc.....cos this gave mi the feeling that i never had before...i won forget u .....heard that she already had boyfriend le,hope that the guy treat her well and dun bully her...祝福你们，永远幸福快乐。even though this is not wat i wanna say but i have no choice just wish her happy will do....
//you left me alone at 9:24 PM
17 November 2007
help...!!!!
:
i was alone again...today never do my medium thing cos i m sick.in the afternoon,i saw doc.he take my temperature and it was 38.8 it was high fever and my throat was damn pain...i feel help,my whole body pain.feel like vomiting but cant....doc give me medicine and say if it has not recover on monday go see him again...hais.......very 辛苦.............help ......my head also feel giddy..like spining.....tis is the badly sick i have in my whole life.......again i saw her blog...hopfully that the guy return to her and hug her tightly我只能默默地看着她去爱别的人，祝你幸福快乐。
//you left me alone at 8:40 PM
16 November 2007
爱一回伤一回
:
不知不觉，有过了一天。心情如何呢！我想每一到周末，我想会和她见面。可是这以经过去了。她也不在和我联络，这是我要的结局吗？我无法选择，每当，经过我们去过的地方，我会默默地把眼泪往心里流是我把爱情放得太深还是我太爱她了？我想两样都有。所谓的我爱你，已不是我了。所以，我爱你这句话，可说是感动可说是伤人。原本，我还以为我们能够在一起长久。人算不如天算。曾经的事就让虽风儿飘过，不能把她给留住，只能默默地看她走过。。。走向别人的怀抱，默默的流下眼泪，真心的祝福她。我俩有缘无份，只好等下世吧！ 我不后悔曾经爱过你，只是不能爱你到最后。我会虽风儿飘过，带我离开这伤心地。
//you left me alone at 5:46 PM
不把伤心路留住
:
back to office again.nothing to do,so i blog lor.......
already 4 days never saw her in msn le...maybe now i can suspect that she already block mi away but anyway hope that she doing fine...i have read her blog she had mention that she still care and love the(guy)hais........wat i m is, already past le. maybe she had forgotten our past and proceed
that way she like....i dunno.....let the water flows into the river ba,holding to it,it also will lid out from our hands one day....so no point la.....i already hurt le i dun wan to get another..u cant imagine how painful the hurt is but past is past it cant be back once again.....
today my whole body pain and muscle ache too..cause yesterday nite i playing with dumbell so maybe it tear my muscle lolx....feel like wanna sick le...hais.........
this weekend coming soon le,,....wonder where to go ...any programme ma?
stay at home watchn tv ba i think.....also dunno where to go too..
//you left me alone at 9:58 AM
15 November 2007
一个人。。。。
:
i was alone @ hm again..brother went out maybe wif his gf ba...momgtg out with her friend and she told mi that she will be late ..ok lolz....
so i write and continue my blogging lor...
to many for u will find that why cant mi meet my friends or look for activity
all friend got gf le accept few of them but dun wan la...dun wan to disturb them as they also have their programme as well wait they meet gal or watch movie with them i like light bulb like that
so only my msn and blog accompany mi lo...
i knew that i may not have more friends like my age cause in my age of 15 i mix around wif uncle more than my sec friends cos of my sin tau maybe...so now my uncle friends more than my 20s friends....haha
my heart try to call her but dunno she will angry a not so i didnt...wonder how she is ,doing fine ma?i read her blog,she still like the guy. when i saw it,i got a feeling that she seem unhappy and sad.when clubbing she will get drunk to forget him...hais........tell mi wat to do？
i really cannot dun wan think of her even if she did not reply mi or wat i will also think of wat is she doing,eat le ma,how's work etc......this have been 1 month plus le i everyday think the same things for her...but i know to mi is unfair or wat but i really cant image from the starting we meet to now things change a lots..till now i must face the reality which is now.i disappointed and can say very sad.
hais........can this sarrow left mi,i really dun want to be in there.i know nobody can help mi step out of the sarrow or the saddness but i really cant step out......people ask mi not to think so much but my heart just cant i dunno y.....
为何幸福你会哭泣
不忍相爱结果是你失去自己
曾有一度让你离去风风雨雨
爱又让我们在一起
我知道你受了委屈
不能否认你我原本太多不同
就像日夜擦身而过
用一生去寻刹那的梦
我已决心爱到底决心不回去
就算一步就踏进地狱今生我决不负 你
不负你一句就算你会离去meaning ful rite ....only sad song will accompany mi throughout the day and nite.......
//you left me alone at 9:37 PM
another boring day
:
..hais...............to some people is another new and bright day for them but to mi it another boring day.to mi it not a new or an excited day ,i dunno y ...maybe i afraid of lonely ba....as usual when i reach my desk i will online in msn but i cant see her online ....is she gtg to hide mi or wat...i really dunno.....but how it is, i won fan or msn her ,now wat i learn from is,dun fall in love easy which u must see the character and is she stable or ready for the relationship....my heart still haven recover the hurt which i have....in relationship either u r happy or sad when come to the end.happy=prepare to get marry sad=break upfor mi now ....i will not be in any relationship cause maybe i haven meet a gd ones ba or maybe who r ready and stable for realtionship.let fate be la.....
//you left me alone at 10:21 AM
14 November 2007
...waiting....
:
is another boring day to mi even though it is not a public day or weekend....this weekend like worst still haven find programme for myself...today mom off work so she cook for us todaymy favourite chicken wings....i was online now but cant see her maybe she block mi or not in......must it be a miserable ending to mi it is.....i feeling which cant say so much and how to explain....she thought that if she continue to treat mi in this way,i will continue to lead a gd life or find a gf gal....even she didnt do that i will lead a gd life,,,but for finding a gal gf i think this must have fate first...i know that no point to hold on cos as she say we r from different world maybe in lifestyle ba...she like clubbing which i don go often...she club till 6 am which i don like to stay till so late...maybe my looks look like i m a chiongster but i m not...i like to accompany my gf (if i have)to shop,watch movie or go the sea side,to cycle or to stroll along the beach or gtg to oversea....maybe i like romance ba but i know that romance won last long...to mi as long as both love each other can le...and must stable in relationship...playing in relationship is a waste of time and hurt people's feeling.....hm.....just wish that very thing from today goes smoothly ba.....christmas is coming le still have abt 1 month plus...hope that this year i won be alone cos every year christmas i was alone so just hope for it ba...不让寂寞带你走.....
//you left me alone at 4:17 PM
13 November 2007
.....leaving......
:
YESTERDAY I SAW ONLINE,SO I ASK HER HOW DID SHE TAKE HER PHONE AS HER PHONE WENT FOR REPAIR.SHE REPLY BUT END UP SHE SAY:STOP DISTURB MI CAN,I HATE U". I REPLY:FROM THE STARTING I NEVER DID ANY THING WRONG Y U HATE MI" WHEN I SAW THIS MESSAGE FROM HER MY HEART SEEM LIKE WANNA CRY,I WANNA TOLD HER THAT U HAVE ALREADY FORGOTTEN OUR HAPPY MEMORIES LE HUH,Y U TREAT MI IN THIS WAY.BUT WAT I ONLY REPLY HER IS THAT NOT I WANT I REPLY HER :I HATE U,Y U TREAT MI IN THIS WAY." SHE REPLY :GOOD LO,I HOPE THAT U HATE MI" AFTER THAT I DIDNT REPLY LE... ABT 11 PLUS SHE SMS MI "SORRY BOY..I KNOW I M HARSH BUT IF IT COULD LET YOU LEAD A NEW LIFE ..I REALLY DON MIND U HATE MI.TAKE CARE OF URSELF...WHEN I SAW HER SMS I WAS HAPPY ALTHOUGH IT JUST FEW WORD WHICH I DUN LIKE TO SEE BUT IT SEEM LIKE SHE STILL CARE FOR MI.IS IT OR NOT I ALSO DUNNO HAIS.....EVEN BOTH LIKE OR LOVE EACH OTHER,THEY WON BE TOGETHER IS T I BELEIVE IN SO HOPE THAT SHE IS DOING FINE AND TAKE CARE OF HERSELF CAN LE.
//you left me alone at 5:36 PM
love????
:
everyone has go through before but has anyone go through how hard which i i cross across before.this is how i starts.
once i love a gal who i waited 5 years.in sec 3 times till i finish my army which is abt my age of 20.To mi this gal whoever she marry to, i think this guy very fortunate.she is different in the way she thinks.she very mature,but she will hide her problem to herself and thinking of ways to help others.still remember that her birthday is just before mi.isnt it so acculate,i know her since she sec 1.we together in someday in april 2001,we together abt few MONTHS ONLY I THINK LESS THAN 6 MONTHS....when we together ya...quite pressure cause in a few months i didnt even hold her hands..tat nvm to mi cause of some reason to her.so i didnt want to force her.
thing change lots,a lots of teachers know that we together tat times and a lots of teacher told her not to be with mi maybe cause that time i very bad la and then she also must study other than tat she is a prefect.haha...cant imagine rite...i this kind of character also can a prefect be my gf huh but this is lastt time wat my character is now on more le.....so many lots of thing happen so we break but i tell her that i will wait and i really waited for her....she even know that i still can remember the first days when i ORD i sms her telling her that i still waiting for her and ask her come out.we have and we went to suntec city then walk to the sea near fullerton.we chat she say that she is happy to see mi still waiting for her .....etc.........but at last we never together cause lots of thing different and also her parents and maybe church friends ba..............
so abt another few months i got into a relationship,she also my schoolmate and things dun went so smoothly,her mom dislike her with mi maybe i m medium ba,..i try a lots of effort but fail..franky i was sad damn sad so i going to put tattoo in my chest.it is a samurai holding a spears pointing towards my heart it indicate mi and remain mi that whenever i was in realtionship in the end my heart will be break......
so in few months later, again i meet a gal she is one of my internet friend who wan to invite mi to her birthday party she i met her there....as conversation start and thing happen we together...she seem ok but when she came into my hse she doesnt want to greet or chat with my realtive as she will give one face...yup maybe her character is like that but wat her father say y being together with a medium..other than this her character towards my family doesnt change.a lots of time becos of her i qurrell with mom...she might not know and doesnt change so that time i was in very difficult position so we break........
later on during my who is my mom godson birthday i met her so she is my brother ex classmate so i ask my brother to ask her no she gave mi and we contact..smoothly we chat on phone and went out.i still remember that the first day we meet i feel very excited that we walk up and down in commonthwealth mrt station firstly we at taxi stand,we wait abt 10 min to my friend place which i wanna ask him something there were no taxi so we walk across the brigde to wait but when we reach to another side i forgot to withdraw money so we went back again.after withdraw money then at last we hired a cab and go to my friends there.at there we stay for a while after that we went to PS to have dinner....we dine in at swensce....after 1 week we been togther but at first thing went very smoothly that i even stay overnite at her hse.. she is the gal that i even stay at her hse every friday....when i sleep at her room our door r open.she ask mi y i did open cause i say any thing ur parent won say any thing ,she find mi very different from her ex,slowly her mom like mi lots who we can chat like a friend.
i spoken to her mom like how i does to my friend who is the same age as her mom.her mom say that i m mature.every thing when i went to her hse i feel happy cause her mom treat mi very good and nv look down on or say y with a medium together.maybe this i feel gd lolx..........
in this relationship i try to give her all my best and whole hearteven she go clubbing i will never say no or wat but i waited for her even thought that she say mi not wait.i worry for her.whether she got get drunk a not or is she @hm safety?i even plan to go genting with her.yes we did @5oct we went but she say that her heart not wif mi...u noe hw i feel when she treat mi liike that...damn pain....i wish i m the one she love and the fate is not.she leave le and ask mi to find a beta one.hiass.....whenever i came across love song i will think abt her and our happy momeries time...i won force u to be with mi but must take care of urself...whoever bully her i will never give a damn and wat my past is i will be back those who bully her i will goes to them...maybe i m silly but i know if someone u love cant be ur side wat can u do is that scretly protect her.if she find tat too fan or irritating time will prove it.
maybe stay on or move on ba.but gd momeries will always in my heart. i really hurts many times le hope that if there is another one i hope i will have a long and stable relationship... but let fate be la........
//you left me alone at 12:03 AM
12 November 2007
memorise
:
last nite,i she her onlie so i chat with her,she reply very fast.it is the first time she reply so fast since we break.her phone spoil she mention to mi that.along the conversation she also told mi that wat she met someday in mos.i was surprisely and ask her to take care but she seem that i gtg to lecture her.she say i very naggy and she tat we cant be friend also/y she treat mi like this.did i did any thing wrong?hope that she will take care of herself wherever she goes.although we break le,i still worry for her,she ask mi not to wait for her and waste so much time on her,ask mi to find my true love.i m a stranger to her as if that we never know each other before she mention before but to mi cant. i dunno y.she ask mi to take time to heal my hurt.i can do it but cant forget her.suddenly a song came across mi this song it seem like very meaningful it can be describle that during our times up and down and wat she wanna to tell mi earlier which is abt our 1 months plus.this tittle is : zai ni yan li wo kai jian zhi ji de ji mo... i will memorise it hope that we have a chance to sing it together...just hope and wish the days will come true.but i will try the best to move on........
//you left me alone at 11:22 AM
10 November 2007
?????
:
???
last nite i 4am then sleep.i was chatting on the phone with my ex gf,during the conversation we had talk abt past and now.heard that she had a bf who dote her a lots and happy for her that bless them that they we be together in long term.follow that we chat the days in school and surprisely heard that wat her brother did now.her brother is a medium too...
as a medium is not so easily be.u can save other people but not urself...i regrett to be but i have no choice,...i lost a lots of thing casue i was a medium i really spent a lot fo time in it.i would wan to stop but i dunno how..sometime i will think that i helpp people but who gtg to help mi.when i need help.
i also heard that how life is my ex school mate and wat they had did although it past i really hope that time can be back again during school time.if time can be back , firstly ,i would study hard first but i won le everything is a past that only can recall during the school times.
tonite,i gtg to my brotherrom celebration.brother i here wish u and ur wife stay together forever..amaong us two of my brother rom le dunno who the third one...but i t won be mi cause i know that my sin tua thing haven done finish so if i have gf and willing to rom that time i hope that i can stop my sin tua things.not every gal can accept de if the gal accept rite not every parent can accept also.let fate be la....
if she or he is belong to u soon or later she will.love cannot be force or else in the future both will also suffer.....
November 09, 2007
//you left me alone at 4:27 PM
alone
:
alone
today is a public holiday,it a boring day for mi..doning nothing
yesterday nite i watching tv till 3 am..while watchin i drink martell alone dunno y but suddenly fel like drinking.yup my friend got ask mi out but i didnt wan cause maybe no mood ba...if i with her now i think i will accompany her but now nothing...she left le,,...haiz...
by the way in the afternoon i went to sgh to see my godfather he was admitted to hospital but can be discharge tomorrow le... hope he that he is fine...when seeing him like that in this state life r short u dunno what will happen the next moment or the next day.so cherish the ones or thing beside u or cherish everything u have...so if a thing or a person left u will have no regrett cause u have already cherish it or them.tomorrow is friday again,dunno wat to do or where to go..but when i was with her i still can meet her or go to her hse but now nothing...haissss......it already past,now i can onli recall wat and how wonderful thing we had.hope every day she is fine and have a gd day hope that she take care of herself.
see how maybe i will go clubbing with friends but i dunno where to go maybe go hm ba....
November 08, 2007
//you left me alone at 4:26 PM
ex 3rd month anniversary
:
ex 3rd month anniversary
Today is mi and sha nu 3rd month anniversay,if we didnt break.she told mi that to move on and find a gd ones.gals are like that when treat them gd they say treat them gd if treat them bad they say bad.haiz....i still think of her i dunno y she cant give mi a chance that we can patch back.when days falls on wed,friday and sat...i will sat i will worry for her dunno when she in clubbing is there anyone bully her...maybe i m silly but when it come into relationship i dun think it is... it is LOVE...i miss the days we have.. it very sweet..everyday i will read through my message which she send mi when we r together..but now ...nothing...i know she she still not stable and i can wait but she did told mi tat when guy say they will wait but at last they won...now i will prove her but scare that she dislike the way i did..a lots of thing there will surely be a ?????of course it also when come into relationship...wat come i do now is that pray and hopfully she is fine and take care of herself.let fate be la...the more i say to her she will find that i very fan.so let her when she is stable she know how to think well and hopfully these days come soon.
//you left me alone at 4:23 PM
